Kirk Novak: 10 Fucking Things You Wish You Had Fucking Known When You Were Fucking Younger

I’m getting pretty fucking old. That means my value as a fucking human being is pretty fucking diminished in our fucking youth-oriented society. All that is left to do now is fucking sit around and fucking live with regret until I fucking die. I made a list of 10 fucking things I wish I had fucking known when I was fucking younger.

Fucking hold up. Age is a fucking social construct, which is something the fucking kids say about everything. You fucking learn through fucking experience so here are 10 fucking things you can do at any fucking age as you fucking figure them out.

  1. Fucking smile at people! Say fucking hello! But don’t ever fucking tell someone to fucking smile you fucking creep! You don’t fucking know what is fucking going on with them!
  2. Stop taking yourself so fucking seriously! Especially if you’re a fucking comedian because you’re supposed to be a fucking comedian!
  3. Be fucking nice, don’t be fucking mean! That is a pretty fucking simple concept!
  4. Chill the fuck out! People make fucking mistakes!
  5. Stop taking everything so fucking personally! Your fucking choice of fucking smartphone does not fucking define you as a fucking person!
  6. Don’t be so fucking judgmental! Treat fucking people with the fucking dignity and fucking respect you think you fucking deserve!
  7. Travel fucking everywhere! Live fucking anywhere! Have a lot of fucking experiences in a lot of fucking places! Work at a lot of different fucking jobs! Live your fucking life!
  8. Do not let fucking anxiety, fear, and hate fucking limit you! If you are afraid to do something, fucking do it, and then if it is fucking terrible you don’t have to fucking do it ever again, but you just might fucking love it!
  9. Don’t fucking value money above fucking everything else! I’m not fucking saying not to make fucking money we all need fucking money! Fucking get your fucking priorities fucking straight! Take that fucking self-inventory!
  10. Do whatever it fucking takes to make you fucking happy! If fucking people aren’t being fucking supportive of you, fuck them, you have no fucking time for them!


Have a great fucking day! I fucking love you! I fucking mean it!

 

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