Kirk Novak: Dad begins to question existence of God during drive to church on Sunday

Dad begins to question existence of God during drive to church on Sunday
St. Louis, MO

After first misidentifying a homeless man with an unkempt, white beard as Santa Claus, six-year-old Tywin Cheester proceeded to ask his Dad if the double-amputee veteran in front of the Walgreens begging for change in a wheelchair was actually God.

Dad shouted at Tywin, “God can be anything he wants to be and that might be God testing people’s faith,” but then muttered something out of the corner of his mouth that was imperceptible to the boy sitting in the backseat of the car as they drove to church.

What Tywin did not hear was Dad angrily question the existence of the very God they were driving to worship. Road closures and traffic jams caused by the marathon being held in the city that Sunday repeatedly blocked their way.

“Jesus Christ,” Dad violently screamed as he made an abrupt left turn up a side street, narrowly missing oncoming traffic. “Go to hell,” he sternly commanded to the cars honking their horns. Tywin watched his Dad make a gesture that looked a little bit like the sign of the cross to the traffic behind them.

Dad drove down the block but he had to stop when they reached another barricade. He stared furiously at the sea of people running down the cross street before them. Tywin watched as Dad let out a deep breath, put his head on the steering wheel, and began to mumble a prayer that sure did contain a lot of curse words.

“Fuck it, Tywin. We’re not going to church today,” Dad relented as he put the car in reverse and went backwards up the street. Tywin wondered what would happen to their souls if they skipped church, but as he opened his mouth Dad blurted out, “God doesn’t care.”

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